I’m in a funk today. My heart is heavy for friends facing impossible things. I didn’t sleep well last night and I haven’t felt like doing all the adult things, so I was not sad that today happened to be our 4 year old’s first ever day camp. I dropped her off this morning and spent 4 hours getting things done in glorious silence.

When I went to pick that kiddo up at noon, I was greeted by raging protest to stay and eat lunch with her friends. Awesome. She then moved quickly into total meltdown over the disappearance of the slime she made during art class.

We left with tears (hers), a bad attitude (mine), and no slime.

My instinct was to tell her what a jerk she was being, lay down the law, and perhaps throw a little tantrum of my own. Since a tiny little voice in my head whispered that I might regret those things, I opted for the oldie but goodie… IF YOU DON’T HAVE ANYTHING NICE TO SAY, DON’T SAY ANYTHING AT ALL. I’m not talking about giving the silent treatment. I’m talking about holding my tongue until I could be intentional with my words. You know- respond instead of react.

Once we were home and had food in our bellies (hanger helps nothing), I was able to speak to my daughter rationally. I thought about what I need when I’m having one of those days when everything feels too big, and since today is also one of those days for me, I didn’t have to think very hard. Sometimes I need someone to tell me I’m being a jerk, but most times I need grace. I need my person to give me some space, meet me half way, and walk with me back to reason. So that’s what I offered my daughter. We talked about expectations, disrespectful behavior, and how to handle disappointment better next time.

And then we made slime- nasty, gooey, messy, stretchy slime. We played together, we cut each other some slack, and, at least in that small moment, all our feelings felt a little less big. And for now, that is enough.