400 miles of highway separate me and my youngest brother. On one end I live with my family. On the other end he lives with his. A few times a year we take turns making the trek to visit one another- to step into the other’s world for a day or two.

We watch our children play together. We plan our time around the food that we’ll eat and the family we can gather around the table. We catch up on life, reminisce over our childhoods, and poke fun at how very different we are.

We grew up in the same home, but as adults we’ve chosen very different lives.

I catch flak for being the hippie city girl. My world has shopping malls, Whole Foods, and endless restaurants. My backyard chickens are fat, spoiled, egg laying pets. I am a left leaning Jesus lover. I’m a big fan of central heat & air and swimming pools. My winding roads, rolling hills, and tall trees comfort me and make me feel safe.

My grown baby brother is a country boy. His world is down a dirt road, 30 minutes from the closest Walmart, and their meat, milk, and eggs come from animals they have raised. His farm is his way of life and his business, as are the sheep, chickens, cows, horses, and dogs that fill it. He’s firmly planted in the Christian right. A wood stove heats his house in the winter and in the summer his kids swim in a pond. His open plains and constant breeze makes him feel free.

We are different, but we are the same.

We love our children and our spouses. We are committed to the well being of our communities. We agree that hot coffee is the only way to start the day and that gravy goes with everything. We bow our heads to pray with our children before meals and bedtime. I know, without a doubt, that he would do anything for me, and he knows the same.

I treasure the experiences my daughter gets to have in my brother’s world. She helps care for the animals, rides horses, and jumps on round bales of hay.  She runs free and ends every day covered in the dust of her play.

When they are here, I take my niece and nephew to see Santa at the mall, ride the Ferris wheel at the carnival, and slather them in sunscreen for a day in the pool.

It is both new and familiar. It grows not only our children, but it grows me, too. I look at the world through a different lens when we are all together. I see that my way is not the only way to a good life. I see that our differences set us apart and bond us together. We each have things to offer and I’m so grateful for the different colors in our palettes. I respect the life he has chosen for his family and I find comfort in returning to the place that I have chosen for mine. And it is good.

We will continue to travel that long highway that connects our worlds- the highway to and from the comfort zone.