Almost two years ago, my husband and I unexpectedly found and bought the home we’d always dreamed of. The school district of our choice. Minutes from family. A piece of land just big enough for a garden, a few chickens, and space for our daughter to run and play. A pool in the back yard. A house big enough for friends and family to gather. Enough bathrooms that I’d never again have to brush my teeth while my husband pooped. (Can I get an Amen?) It sounds pretty perfect, right?

This home was built in the 1990’s– not old enough for old home character or historical features, but not new enough for shiny new cabinetry or a spa-like master bathroom. Just a big home with the best plaid wallpaper that 90’s country décor had to offer and more honey oak cabinetry and trim than you could shake a stick at. Still, we displayed little chill in declaring it the perfect fit for us.

No sooner than we closed did I begin channeling my inner Joanna Gaines. We began tackling projects as time, energy, and budget allowed. To my utter surprise, I ultimately settled on a creamy white paint for every wall in the house. Then I primed every piece of trim and crown molding and painted it gray. I’m pretty sure my wood purist father-in-law died a little inside at the thought, but I love it so much. It’s fresh and clean and it feels like ours. We’ve changed light fixtures and switches and outlets. We’ve done this, that, and the other. There’s still plenty we’d like to do when the budget will allow, but slowly this house has become our home and I treasure the space we’re creating together.

My personal style leans toward the recent farmhouse trend, but it doesn’t fall directly in line with what any decorator might prescribe. It’s just us. It’s clean and unfussy. It’s lived in and peaceful and easy. What we’ve created feels like home for us, but your style will be your own.

Whether you dream of white on white on white or your ideal color palette requires sunglasses, don’t let anyone tell you that something doesn’t go or needs to be different. If you love it, then it’s just right. Whether you stay up late planning your next décor change or your design has remained untouched for 20 years, don’t be bullied into thinking that it needs to be anything but your home. It is yours. If HGTV marathons make you happy, then do it, girl. If you’d rather set your hair on fire than worry about window coverings, that’s cool, too. Your home belongs to you and your family. What you have, what you can afford, and what you love is what works. That is what goes. It may not be featured on a home improvement channel, but your life is not a reality show. It is reality.

News flash: it doesn’t have to be perfect. Your friends and family don’t care if your throw pillows match the rug or if the living room motif more closely resembles a toy store than a magazine spread. They care that you are there. They care if there’s a place to sit and a friend to visit with. They want to know it’s okay to help themselves to a drink from the fridge and to put their feet up on the coffee table. And snacks. No matter what color your walls or how old your furniture, snacks are the perfect accessory. Your friends will never whisper behind your back, “The house was pretty enough, but those chocolate chip cookies just really didn’t go.”

I love many things about my house, and I hope to call it ours for many years to come. As it turns out, though, the thing I love most about our home is the thing I loved most about the tiny old house we called ours for 10 years. The people I share it with. My people make this house my home. I’m also not sad about the extra bathrooms.